NEW CAR

[Stony Branch Kennels]

A woman bought a new Lexus LS400, and returned the next day, complaining
that she couldn't figure out how the radio worked.
The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated. "Watch this!" he
said..."Nelson!"
The radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?"
"Willie!" he continued....and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers.

The woman drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time she'd
say, "Beethoven," she'd get beautiful classical music, and if she said,
"Beatles!" she'd get one of their awesome songs.

One day, a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed her new car, but she
swerved in time to avoid them. "IDIOTS!" she yelled.

John Kerry came on and introduced the French National Anthem, sung by the
Dixie Chicks

[Emery]