How to shower!

[Chris N.]

How to Shower Like a Woman...
>
> 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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> 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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> 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note to do more sit-ups.
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> 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
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> 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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> 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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> 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
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> 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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> 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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> 10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
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> 11. Shave armpits and legs.
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> 12. Turn off shower.
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> 13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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> 14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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> 15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
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> 16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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> 17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> How To Shower Like a Man...
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> 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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> 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'Woo-Woo' sound.
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> 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your a@@.
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> 4. Get in the shower.
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> 5. Wash your face.
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> 6. Wash your armpits.
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> 7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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> 8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
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> 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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> 10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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> 11. Shampoo your hair.
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> 12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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> 13. Pee.
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> 14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
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> 15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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> 16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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> 17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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> 18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo'sound again.
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> 19. Throw wet towel on bed.
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> If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this email, there is something so very wrong with you

[Emery]

lmbo!!!!!

Except I don't pee in the shower.

[yankeerebelkennels]

Man that WAS funny.........