Ode To The Anonymous Critic

[Jamie Rice]

"Ode To The Anoynomous Critic"

Through the briars I run with my judge's book in my hand.
These culls won't place, let alone win; why can't some of these owners just understand?
This pack has been swinging, skirting, and humping every leg from the start.
Oh Lord what's that I smell; for heaven's sake did some Hoosier, Hillbilly, or Buckeye just fart?

Oh no, it's the stench of a gallery judge that's always wanting to bitch.
For my thankless duty I'm never going to get ahead; I'm far from ever getting rich.
I keep asking myself why I do it; I keep telling myself I'm here to better the breed.
However for my bloodstained and bruised muscled effort, I get more grief than anyone will ever need.

Out of the bush I come with torn clothes and briar-scratched skin.
Oh I didn't place your hound; what is it, did I commit a worldly sin?
A couple bucks in my pocket for gas and food and a four hour drive home.
I should be in bed, but for some reason on the internet I go to roam.

No matter how hard I run, no matter how hard I try.
There's gonna be some ungrateful jackass that's going to cry.
Most of us that judge have ten to twenty years in this game,
And still after all the hours we spend judging and trialing dogs, most of us don't have a champion to our name.

On the Question and Answer boards they go to pi$$ and moan.
Here's a suggestion next time bring a rabbithound; I have one or two I can loan.
Talk to me in person is all I ask; there shouldn't be reason nor rhyme,
That these cowards go at it on the internet, one finger and one key at a time.

Anonymously they tell everyone how their keyboard mutt was done wrong.
Each and every week, it's the same old song.
There's no hugging, there's no kissing.
To hear these fools talk, Vaseline seems to be the only thing they're missing.

You guys can't wait to get home and turn Internet Explorer on with little regret.
Therefore here's a site all you idiots can visit... WWW CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, GROW A SET!

[Huntin54]

Fuzz i feel the same way as you put it. All they do is pee and mone is right.

[DERRELL]

YOU NEED TO JUDGE PP THE HANDLERS ALWAYS SHAKE YOUR HAND AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. MOST TIME SOME ONE WILL EVEN HAVE A BOTTLE OF WATER OR COKE FOR YOU. KEEP TRYING LOL DERRELL

[palestinian]

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[jdmart]

Thats a good one Jamie!!