A letter we recieved from Pike County

[Guess who?]

We don't live where we did when I last talked to you. Lynn read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved to Pike Co. Ky. I won't be able to send you the address because the last Redneck family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address. We spruced up the new house a bit, We first had to remove the crime-scene tape on the front door , then we hammerd bottle caps into the frame of the front door to make it look nice, and we replaced the telephone cable spool with a new coffee table we picked up at a garage sale, then we put a toilet seat ,as a picture frame around grampas` picture , Looks real nice.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.

I took my daughters coat by mistake and it would be too heavy to send back in the mail with the buttons on, so I cut them off and put them in the pockets.

Lynn locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and the beagles out.

My daughter had a baby this morning; but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if I`m a grandma or a grampa .My daughter tells me the baby looks like my brother....


Three of our friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ramey was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Our other two friends were in back. They drowned because Ramey couldn't get the tailgate down. Too bad, they were two of Lynn’s favorite judges.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love, Mr. And Mrs Perkins.

P.S. I was going to send you this letter thru` the internet, but the envelope was too big to fit in that little slot in my computer.
This will be the last letter you will be gettin` from us for a while, as Pa and I are taking a small trip so will be away for a while, we are going to see some dog run out of some dog named Hale-Bopp>

[Lynn Perkins]

HA HA Man you have out did yourself this time.Took a lot out of you to come up with this one or did you just copy it and change a few things around?(stupid)
This is very funny stuff but theres only one catch! You can laugh and joke with or about me all you want,i'm a big boy and can take it,but the only people that i feel can ad my wife or family in one of their jokes would be one of my friends.
I have studied and studied and just can't remember having any friends named GUESS WHO?

So when you get the ASS to post your name there Guess who,she might find it funny also if your one of my friends but if your not,i might end up getting the last laugh!! chiken

Oh and by the way,i have NO favorite judges.Ramey will just have to be a little quicker with the tailgate or keep it better greased there(stupid)

P.S. You can my white
Now you have a nice day!!

[DRamey]

Perkins, you're just one crude individual. Besides, we're still in mourning for those lost in the pickup crash in the river. Poor Ronnie and Stacy and Lance! Far better to have been some old guy like Terry!!!!!! Or even me!!!!