I never had a swarm of snakes chase me
Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 8:09 am
Things I learned this weekend
A guy bought some round bales of hay last year and never picked the last six up. He sent a guy to pick them up Sunday. I was running picking them up and loading them with a rear mounted hay spear on an open cab tractor. It was hot and I had been moving hay around all day. I was wearing shorts, and had shed my shirt a couple hours earlier. (Several key pieces to the the story).
These bales had been outside for 3 years, and were mostly mulch. If he wanted them, I was glad to load them to get them out of the way. I backed into the fifth bale and pulled out. As I ride through the gate, I get stung on the chin. I’m swatting, grabbing and cussing. I thought, “Uh-oh, I must have stirred up a yellow jacket nest”. I hit the fuel on the tractor to wide open, straightened the tractor out (because I was headed for the fence after I gave up driving for a few seconds to swat bees), and ducked down to drive out of the fury of bees. Now, anyone that has ever drove a tractor knows that when you hit the fuel on a tractor, it makes more noise but doesn’t really speed up.
“Owwww, uhhhhgg, dangit, ahhhh” I’m still getting lit up and it is getting worse.
I look back at the hay bay to realize there is a swarm of yellow jackets all around that bale. Now remember the key pieces I was telling you a while ago. Yep, there I am wearing shorts, no shirt, in an open cab tractor, with a bale of hay about 6 feet behind me that apparently made a fine place for a nest until I ran the hay spear through it. Once I realized that I was carrying the problem with me, I did the most logical thing. I hit the kill switch and ran through the barn yard like my head was on fire.
Here is a little fact about yellow jackets that some people may not know. They sting and bite at the same time. I’ve looked down before and seen their stinger dug in and biting at the same time. This allows them to hold on their victim making them harder to swat off. I got about 50 yards away stopped and literally pinched the last one and plucked it from my arm pit.
So now I am stuck with the dilemma of having to go back and get the tractor, which still has the bale of hay on the spear and about 100 yellow jackets swarming. I don’t know if yellow jackets hate all tractors, or just Massey Fergusons, but they were bouncing of the metal and you could see them stinging the seat (the only soft part on the tractor).
The guy that came to pick up the hay eased over and started the tractor, after a few minutes I went over and the let the bale down hard (hoping to smash their entrance). A couple minutes later I hopped on, shoved it in gear, and drove off. You ever seen the scary movies where the victim being chase by the guy with a chainsaw can't start their car, get it in gear, or drive off.
I felt like that victim, and I couldn't move fast enough even though according to by-standers the overall speed I was moving and shucking gears was impressive.
I hopped on, put it in gear, and dumped the clutch - nothing.
Key fact you tend to forget when "under fire" -To start a tractor, you must put the transmission and transfer case in neutral before it will start.
You tend to forget this when you are dodging yellow jackets. I stomp the clutch, yank the stick on the transfer case and dump the clutch. The tractor lunged, and I heard the guy picking up the hay said "I set the brake". So now I'm scrambling to unset the park brake, and finally get moving. I got stung again in the back. The guy picking up the hay said, “Hey Matt their on your hat. I slung my hat, baled off the tractor, then realizing that it was still running and in gear. I ran back and pulled the kill switch.
After a few minutes I load the last bale and David came up with a can of wasp spray. The guy picking up the hay said, “Give me that spray – I’m going to take that bale too.”
He hopped on the tractor backed into the bale, swatted and sprayed, drove about ten yards and sprayed again, backed up to the trailer, dropped the bale and drove off.
He was laughing and said, “Don’t you tell my brother I knew that yellow jacket nest was in there. I’m just going to pull the trailer up in his yard, un-hook and drive off”.
I laughed and he said, “You know he would do the same thing to me”.
He threw a strap over the bales, tightened them and drove off with the windows up.
So what I learned this weekend.
1. Yellow jackets will build a nest in the center of an old round bale of hay.
2. When you back the hay spear into the nest, it would be much better to be wearing a shirt and long pants, and better yet to be in an enclosed cab.
3. You are better off to drop the bale of hay and keep driving opposed to pulling the kill switch, jumping off the tractor and running away like your head is on fire.
4. If your buddy drops your trailer off with a load on it, don’t assume that there isn’t a yellow jacket nest in it.
People talk about hating snakes - I never had a swarm of snakes chase.
I hate yellow jackets.
A guy bought some round bales of hay last year and never picked the last six up. He sent a guy to pick them up Sunday. I was running picking them up and loading them with a rear mounted hay spear on an open cab tractor. It was hot and I had been moving hay around all day. I was wearing shorts, and had shed my shirt a couple hours earlier. (Several key pieces to the the story).
These bales had been outside for 3 years, and were mostly mulch. If he wanted them, I was glad to load them to get them out of the way. I backed into the fifth bale and pulled out. As I ride through the gate, I get stung on the chin. I’m swatting, grabbing and cussing. I thought, “Uh-oh, I must have stirred up a yellow jacket nest”. I hit the fuel on the tractor to wide open, straightened the tractor out (because I was headed for the fence after I gave up driving for a few seconds to swat bees), and ducked down to drive out of the fury of bees. Now, anyone that has ever drove a tractor knows that when you hit the fuel on a tractor, it makes more noise but doesn’t really speed up.
“Owwww, uhhhhgg, dangit, ahhhh” I’m still getting lit up and it is getting worse.
I look back at the hay bay to realize there is a swarm of yellow jackets all around that bale. Now remember the key pieces I was telling you a while ago. Yep, there I am wearing shorts, no shirt, in an open cab tractor, with a bale of hay about 6 feet behind me that apparently made a fine place for a nest until I ran the hay spear through it. Once I realized that I was carrying the problem with me, I did the most logical thing. I hit the kill switch and ran through the barn yard like my head was on fire.
Here is a little fact about yellow jackets that some people may not know. They sting and bite at the same time. I’ve looked down before and seen their stinger dug in and biting at the same time. This allows them to hold on their victim making them harder to swat off. I got about 50 yards away stopped and literally pinched the last one and plucked it from my arm pit.
So now I am stuck with the dilemma of having to go back and get the tractor, which still has the bale of hay on the spear and about 100 yellow jackets swarming. I don’t know if yellow jackets hate all tractors, or just Massey Fergusons, but they were bouncing of the metal and you could see them stinging the seat (the only soft part on the tractor).
The guy that came to pick up the hay eased over and started the tractor, after a few minutes I went over and the let the bale down hard (hoping to smash their entrance). A couple minutes later I hopped on, shoved it in gear, and drove off. You ever seen the scary movies where the victim being chase by the guy with a chainsaw can't start their car, get it in gear, or drive off.
I felt like that victim, and I couldn't move fast enough even though according to by-standers the overall speed I was moving and shucking gears was impressive.
I hopped on, put it in gear, and dumped the clutch - nothing.
Key fact you tend to forget when "under fire" -To start a tractor, you must put the transmission and transfer case in neutral before it will start.
You tend to forget this when you are dodging yellow jackets. I stomp the clutch, yank the stick on the transfer case and dump the clutch. The tractor lunged, and I heard the guy picking up the hay said "I set the brake". So now I'm scrambling to unset the park brake, and finally get moving. I got stung again in the back. The guy picking up the hay said, “Hey Matt their on your hat. I slung my hat, baled off the tractor, then realizing that it was still running and in gear. I ran back and pulled the kill switch.
After a few minutes I load the last bale and David came up with a can of wasp spray. The guy picking up the hay said, “Give me that spray – I’m going to take that bale too.”
He hopped on the tractor backed into the bale, swatted and sprayed, drove about ten yards and sprayed again, backed up to the trailer, dropped the bale and drove off.
He was laughing and said, “Don’t you tell my brother I knew that yellow jacket nest was in there. I’m just going to pull the trailer up in his yard, un-hook and drive off”.
I laughed and he said, “You know he would do the same thing to me”.
He threw a strap over the bales, tightened them and drove off with the windows up.
So what I learned this weekend.
1. Yellow jackets will build a nest in the center of an old round bale of hay.
2. When you back the hay spear into the nest, it would be much better to be wearing a shirt and long pants, and better yet to be in an enclosed cab.
3. You are better off to drop the bale of hay and keep driving opposed to pulling the kill switch, jumping off the tractor and running away like your head is on fire.
4. If your buddy drops your trailer off with a load on it, don’t assume that there isn’t a yellow jacket nest in it.
People talk about hating snakes - I never had a swarm of snakes chase.
I hate yellow jackets.