How Do You Deal With Guilt?

beaglesarethebest · Post by **beaglesarethebest** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 9:43 am

I know some of u may think I am just a girl ( well I am..lol) but my little girl beagle was hit and killed wensday morning.. She ran out the door before I could get her on the leash..I am devasted ( I still have my 2 boys) And I feel extremly guilty that I could have done something. I know some of u just think of your dogs as dogs but she was my pet and my only girl. She is buried under our tree in the back yard.

I am not looking for pitty or anything I just want to know how some of u get throu this because I am not doing so well with it all.

Thanks Robyn

beagle crazy · Post by **beagle crazy** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 9:50 am

So sorry for your loss. I haven't had that to happen yet. I've only had dogs for a few years now.

Emery · Post by **Emery** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 9:53 am

Time heals. You didn't do anything that any of us have done numerous times. My kids are notorious for doing the same thing. Charlie gets out when they open the door and leave it wide open deciding what to take outside or if they in fact want to go outside themselves... I am fortunate to live at the end of a road in a subdivision, so when cars do happen to come by, they are going slow looking for a driveway in which to turn around. Charlie likes to bolt across the street to visit the neighbor's golden retreiver girls.

Don't blame yourself, accidents will happen. That is all part of life. You can try redirecting your energy to the other beagles that you have, or on something else to take your mind off of it. Just give it time.

Emery

P.S. Sorry to hear of your loss.

Windkist · Post by **Windkist** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 10:10 am

Sorry that you lost your beagle ;-( Don't let the Guilt eat you up. I once lost a lovely britney puppy the same way. It was heartbreaking but, a complete accident which is what happened to you.

Leah

mjd · Post by **mjd** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 10:51 am

sorry for your loss

FetchingPixels · Post by **FetchingPixels** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 10:58 am

I'm sorry for your loss. I always leave the leash inside the screen door and the main door. I've had to take off a couple times before that but always caught them- thank god.

I guess theres not really much you can do.. cry ... miss her.. and get another dog, not to replace her but just to have another girl around if that's what you miss.

So sorry for your loss. RIP sweet beagle girl!

wvduece · Post by **wvduece** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:05 am

hmmmmmm sorry for your loss the best way for me to deal with guilt is by first forgiving myself and TRY to direct my thoughts towards something postive maybe you are just a girl but we men have the same feelings as anybody else some may not like to show their feelings but i bet they have them you can start forgining yourself by asking yourself if ya did something for menace if ya didnt then its not always your fault things happen sometimes and we cant always figure out WHY life can be tough sometimes but time will help heal your pain jb

Ronnyg · Post by **Ronnyg** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:05 am

Robyn sorry to hear of your loss. Honestly the only thing you can do is let time heal and use this as an unfortunate learning experience. In sharing your story hopefully it will serve as a valuable lesson to others who live where an accident like this can happen. I understand how things like this happen because when back my suburban up in the drive the dogs go nuts cause they know it's time to run or hunt. Many times when I open their door they barge right past me before I can leash them up. It happens to all of us and you did nothing wrong. I hope you come to grips with this and focus on your other dogs. Goodluck!
Ronny

gus · Post by **gus** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:11 am

Think about the good times that you had and keep your mind on something pleasant. Life is tooo short to dwell on the bad. God gave us a beautiful earth and many wonderful things to enjoy. We have freedom and choices so make the best of it.

Beagled1 · Post by **Beagled1** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:11 am

So very sorry to hear about your Beagle girl

You need to view this as an unavoidable tragedy ... There was nothing you had any control over in this situation, not possible for you to have forseen the untinnkable. Allow yourself to grieve but hold on to the fact that she lived a good, happy life.

DRamey · Post by **DRamey** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 2:49 pm

Robyn, I am DRamey's daughter. I am only 5. Daddy is typing this for me and putting it into grown up words. I have seen him really sad about losing his beagles, too. I cried over my puppies when they got sick and died. Daddy is really old, too, in his 40's, and still gets heartbroken over losing one of his hounds because they are more than just dogs, they are friends. From DRamey: Robyn, beaglers stick together in difficult times. We quarrel and argue sometimes, but it is rare to find such a caring, devoted bunch of people when bad things happen. THere are breeders, hunters, people with show beagles, puond rescuers, and just plain pet owners on this board. The common thing that we all share is that we have had beagles that we were very fond of to die and we all know how you feel. Others have said that it will be easier in time and I agree, it will. The unpleasant memory of her dying will be replaced (mostly) by remembering all the good stuff you shared. Take care and best wishes.

Chuck Terry · Post by **Chuck Terry** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 3:23 pm

So sorry Robyn! Most beagle owners have something similar happen at least one time. I still recall SEEING one of mine get run over. It was a real bummer because she was lost and I had just found her down the road from my house. I saw her in the headlights but a car came from the other direction and ran over her before I could get to her. What a roller coaster! I went from sadness to joy and back again as fast as I ever have. I spent quite awhile second guessing and blaming myself for her death. All of the "what if" 's in the world will not bring her back. Don't blame yourself! You did your best and your guilt is a sign that you would not have let it happen had you been able to prevent it! As far as how to get through it, focus on the 2 males and enjoy them to the fullest. Although you can never replace her, you can make new memories. You should consider getting another female if that is an option. Nothing does me more good than a new beagle pup! Best wishes!

Beagleman63 · Post by **Beagleman63** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 3:34 pm

Robyn, There is nothing wrong with loving your dogs the way you do. I'm sure your right that some people just think of them as dogs. I however, have lost relatives that I didn't feel as bad about as I have loosing a good loyal dog! Dogs give you something most people can't even dream of giving, and that is unconditional love. What happened was not your fault. There is a poem called The Rainbow Bridge. I'll see if I can find it and post it here for you. I hope it makes you feel better!

Beagleman63 · Post by **Beagleman63** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 3:40 pm

Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

wvduece · Post by **wvduece** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 3:47 pm

Chuck Terry wrote:So sorry Robyn! Most beagle owners have something similar happen at least one time. I still recall SEEING one of mine get run over. It was a real bummer because she was lost and I had just found her down the road from my house. I saw her in the headlights but a car came from the other direction and ran over her before I could get to her. What a roller coaster! I went from sadness to joy and back again as fast as I ever have. I spent quite awhile second guessing and blaming myself for her death. All of the "what if" 's in the world will not bring her back. Don't blame yourself! You did your best and your guilt is a sign that you would not have let it happen had you been able to prevent it! As far as how to get through it, focus on the 2 males and enjoy them to the fullest. Although you can never replace her, you can make new memories. You should consider getting another female if that is an option. Nothing does me more good than a new beagle pup! Best wishes!

that is a bad situation chuck, i run over one of the best males i have ever owned and i have had rabbit dogs for over 50 years i dont know how the dog got under my back tire but he did n i jumped out of my truck n grabbed him up in my arms n started talking to him like he was a real human man i really hated doing that n for awhile i beat myself up big time i just about got out of dogs for good but after 2 different vets n a huge vet bill he finally died i still rember the good times we had together, one guy i run with brings him name up alot after 6 or 7 years later something will remind me or him of ole COPPER he was a rabbit machine could find one when al;l other dogs had gave up im shure most everybody has had a dog like this in their life he was a once in a lifetime dog or in my eyes anyways but time did help to heal the pain now i got a llot of great memorys of john n his ole dog named COPPER JB